This world is weird. People are weird. Everything’s contradictional to the other. We love and we hate at the same time. We kill and give birth too. We feel, but sometimes we ignore too. We live but somehow life makes us wanna die.
Everywhere, there is an opposition to something. I wonder why they believe that we live to glorify GOD by enjoying Him forever. I don’t understand why we have to glorify HIM by having bad sides of us too. Why can’t we just have the only good sides so we can glorify Him ‘perfectly’? And I never know whether I am ever good enough to be His servant. I don’t even have a right to say that there was something inside of me that has made Him loved me. I mean, I sinned. I do sin and I will continue doing sin. I know I am a sinner, I mean, why didn’t He make us all angels in the first place? Why are we all sinful, but also having GOD’s image and nature, inside of us? Does He need to be understood by somebody? He’s TriUne; A GOD with Three Nature. They say He is enough with Himself, so that noone has to prove His love, because He is love Himself and He can share love between the Three Nature Himself.
So, would something bad happen to GOD if He had never created this world a very very long time ago? Where would I be? I wouldn’t even exist. So I wouldn’t have lived. I wouldn’t have had feelings. I wouldn’t have loved and I wouldn’t have had any experiences about being loved. I wouldn’t have known what love is.
But it has nothing to do with GOD. There will be no changes for Him because I do believe too that He is enough with Himself.
I’m still questioning this. Maybe someday this great mystery in my mind will be revealed. Maybe somebody will answer this for Him, or maybe, yeah I’ll just wait for Him to tell me.
I will ask GOD when I arrive there in heaven.
Maybe, He created me so that someday I can have a little conversation with Him up there, because for now, all I know from the Bible is that all people who has trusted Him and leaned on Him from the day GOD has been calling them to the coming of their death, they will sing until forever and ever for GOD’s glory as soon as they arrived at the eternal home.
Or, maybe as I see My Heavenly Father, I will know the reason, maybe even without asking Him.
Because when I arrive there, we will become real One.
That someday, I really will unite with Him, forever.
Yes, I long for that day.
And thank YOU.